SOME PHOTOS

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pecebaby
Cosplay on Takeshita Street, Harajuku.

While I usually try to keep my photo updates seasonal, general chaos and disorganization prevented me from doing so this past fall… and winter… and spring… I am still in the midst of organizing negatives and reviewing work from the past six months but here is some in no particular order.

bdaycakesurprise
Margaret on her birthday. Far out celebration for some of beloved Gemini’s in my life, rural Massachusetts.
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Urochromes @ Alphaville. Brooklyn.

jessshirt

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Chiro, Maid Dreaming. Tokyo, Japan.
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Chiaki & Waitress, Lock Down. Tokyo, Japan.
MarieDavidsonGOOD
Marie Davidson, Nothing Changes. NYC.
nipplehairtweezer
Plucking with Caroline and Emil.

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For Shredded Nerve “Whatever it Takes” Cs on No Rent Records.
mikeyorwhatever
Seen at Crazy Spirit record release show.
doggiesally
Puppy looking on as Sally gives Jesse a stick and poke.
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Dude During Destruction Unit @ The Market Hotel, Brooklyn.
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C.C.T.V. @ Spiderhouse Ballroom. Austin, Texas.
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MALL PROWLER @ Redlight District. Far Rockaway, New York.
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Gurney post Sheree Rose performance @ Grace Exhibition Space.
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Gag @ Alphaville. Brooklyn.
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Jess post Gag @ 538.
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Chiro, my sunshine in the rain.

 

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Flared Nostril VS MOIL @ Silent Barn. Brooklyn.
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SNAKEHOLE

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Naka & Haruka @ Big Love Record Store/ Gallery.
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VALISE @ Silent Barn. Brooklyn.
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ZZ & Justin setting fire to a shirt that belonged to a bro who tried to fight us on my birthday.
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Sadist @ Palisades, Brooklyn.
bruisedbutt
Kyle dropped Margaret at M.A.P.S. FEST.
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Haruka ❤ Sweets for a sweetie.
MysticInane
Mystic Inane @ Spiderhouse Ballroom. Austin, Texas.
LaMisma
La Misma @ Spiderhouse Ballroom. Austin, Texas.
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Rene
bowlers
This is Austin, not that Great Fest bowling crew.
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Antisocial Terror Fabrication @ Pitbar, Nishiogikubo.
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Haram @ The Market Hotel.
lumpysurf
During Lumpy & the Dumpers.

4ChirroHamster

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Viagra
Holding a photo I had taken of him a few weeks earlier and had just developed 🙂

cowboybutts

 

littleprincescholor
Another cool old guy I met at the MET who claimed to be the world’s authority on The Little Prince.
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“Tongue Kiss” By Genesis P Breyer-Orridge @ The Rubin Museum.

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happiness

littleceaserswchange
Justin paying for our Little Caesars with change.
emmapizza
Emma making a good pizza.

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Chiaki, my amazing host and the man behind P.I.G.S.
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Another one. Late night screaming in his apartment after too much “strong”

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RIXE @ Saint Vitus. Brooklyn.

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Rene and cigarette burns post Horoscope set.
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Spiritual Recess @ Alphaville.
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New friends at my opening at Big Love.
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Mike @ 538;
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My Dad and Ray @ Rays.
1poopers
Fun for all ages!
MeandJess
Me & Jess.
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My Halloween Costume.

Follow me on instagram @JaneChardiet

PHOTOS FROM PHARMAKON TOUR

Rectal Hygienics, Chicago.
Pelada, Toronto.
Pelada, Toronto.
Snoqualmie Falls (as seen on Twin Peaks).
Snoqualmie Falls (as seen on Twin Peaks).
Brother from another Mother, Roswell.
Brother from another Mother, Roswell.
Rev/ Rev, Columbus.
Rev/ Rev, Columbus.
Kyle with Fred "Sonic" Smith of MC5, Detroit.
Kyle with Fred “Sonic” Smith of MC5, Detroit.
Heathens, Providence.
Fake blood, fake nails, really dirty, Tempe.
Fake blood, fake nails, really dirty, Tempe.
Liebestod, L.A.
Liebestod, L.A.
New Orleans.
New Orleans.
Institute, Austin.
Institute, Austin.
Marit on her birthday, Philadelphia.
Marit on her birthday, Philadelphia.
Abandoned building, Detroit.
Abandoned building, Detroit.
Christopher, Philadelphia.
Christopher, Philadelphia.

Christopher, Philadelphia.

A very nice pup, Ottawa.
A very nice pup, Ottawa.
Boys of Paradise, Tempe.
Boys of Paradise jam, Tempe.
Back to Back, Houston.
Back to Back, Houston.
Alex on guest vocals, Chicago.
Alex on guest vocals, Chicago.
Tampon soaked in vodka being inserted into a butt in the back of a limo on Valentine's day, San Francisco.
Tampon soaked in vodka being inserted into a butt in the back of a limo on Valentine’s day, San Francisco.

1685-12{12}2

Alex and Sybil Disobedience, New Orleans.
Alex and Sybil Disobedience, New Orleans.

Living room electronics, Tempe.
Living room electronics, Tempe.
Abandoned Packard plant, Detroit.
Abandoned Packard plant, Detroit.
Fuck Boi, St. Louis.
Fuck Boi, St. Louis.
Sylvia in the surf, San Francisco.
Sylvia in the surf, San Francisco.
After steppin' for Marshstepper, Tempe.
After steppin’ for Marshstepper, Tempe.
Babe, Baltimore.
Babe, Baltimore.
Skull Katalog, Houston.
Skull Katalog, Houston.
Zz, Providence.
Zz, Providence.
Dan Pelissier, Monsieur Montreal in Toronto.
Dan Pelissier, Monsieur Montreal in Toronto.
All ya gotta do is mix em
All ya gotta do is mix em
Fed up doggie, Austin.
Fed up doggie, Austin.
A hotel we stayed in, somewhere.
A hotel we stayed in, somewhere.
Me
Me
Large Marge, Sargent Pepperoni's pizza.
Large Marge, Sargent Pepperoni’s pizza.
... Ohio.
… Ohio.
Rude Girl, San Francisco.
Rude Girl, San Francisco.
Rectal Hygienics, Chicago.
Rectal Hygienics, Chicago.
🙂
Babe, Toronto.
Babe, Toronto.
Reverse Baptism, Baltimore.
Reverse Baptism, Baltimore.
Chris + Margaret, Toronto.
Chris + Margaret, Toronto.
And then I had to fly home for emergency surgery, thee end.
And then I had to fly home for emergency surgery, thee end.

PHOTOS FROM EARLY WINTER

A deep freeze has descended on New York City just a few days before I leave for a full US / Canadian tour with Pharmakon and I am left bored in my room with a cold. I usually wait longer between photo updates, but this past month or so have been pretty prolific. I feel freer just knowing what I am about to do. Treacherous, redundant days are numbered. The smog has been cut.

Mike & Elias. Late night after Cheena show. The day I quit my job to go on tour.
Mike & Elias. Late night after Cheena show. The day I quit my job to go on tour.
Gabby.
Gabby.
Ht me on my celly.
Rolling dice at Molasses Books.
Rolling dice at Molasses Books.
Karaoke night at 538.
Alexis Gross.
Alexis Gross.
Barry.
Barry & some love birds. New Years Day.
Mose. Institute at Silent Barn.

Horoscope at Silent Barn.
Horoscope at Silent Barn.
Puce Mary & Rodger Stella Collab.
Puce Mary & Rodger Stella Collab.
Underwater contact mic subjected to cheap red wine and sour cream and onion chips. Appetite at Silent Barn.
Underwater contact mic subjected to cheap red wine and sour cream and onion chips. Appetite at Silent Barn.
Gotta eat.
Gotta eat.
Spirital Recess at Legion.
Spiritual Recess at Legion.
Max rolling at a Glue show taking flicks with his new selfie stick at Saint Vitus.
Max rolling at a Glue show taking flicks with his new selfie stick at Saint Vitus.
Weird Luke & Alex Heir.
Rick Weaver at Legion.
Rick Weaver at Legion.
Nandas at Saint Vitus.
Nandas at Saint Vitus.
Me.
Me.

Sort of secret commission project in the works.
Sort of secret commission project in the works.
Glue at Saint Vitus.
Glue at Saint Vitus.
Meow.
Meow.
Margaret.
Margaret.

PHOTO UPDATE: JUNE – NOVEMBER

SaranMan
A RETURN TO PHILADELPHIA.
LUST FOR YOUTH, STRANDED WITH A BLOWN TIRE.
LUST FOR YOUTH, STRANDED WITH A BLOWN TIRE.
JANSEN.
JANSEN CUMBIE WITH THE FUCKED UP TIRE.
BARKEV GULESSERIAN AT TABLOID.
BARKEV GULESSERIAN AT TABLOID.

CHRISTOPHER HANSELL AND SAM RYSER AT DRIPPER WORLD.
CHRISTOPHER HANSELL AND SAM RYSER AT DRIPPER WORLD.
TAYLOR BRODE AND EMIL'S PUBIC MOUND. DAWN OF HUMANS AT REDLIGHT DISTRICT.
TAYLOR BRODE AND EMIL’S PUBIC MOUND. DAWN OF HUMANS AT REDLIGHT DISTRICT.
HANKWOOD AND THE HAMMERHEADS TAG ON A TRUCK.
HANKWOOD AND THE HAMMERHEADS TAG ON A TRUCK.
ELIAS BENDER RONNENFELT AND MARGARET CHARDIET.
ELIAS BENDER RONNENFELT AND MARGARET CHARDIET.
MIGUEL ALVARINO AT NO TECH.
MIGUEL ALVARINO AT NO TECH.

 

 

FLEX 1000 PERFORMING WITH SOFIA RETA AT 538.
FLEX 1000 PERFORMING WITH SOFIA RETA AT 538.
ODWALLA 88
ODWALLA 88 AT REDLIGHT DISTRICT
KICK IT, LICK IT.
KICK IT, LICK IT.
SARA ABRUNA DJING AT PRIMITIVE LANGUAGES FOR DARK CHART RELEASE PARTY.
SARA ABRUNA DJING AT PRIMITIVE LANGUAGES FOR DARK CHART RELEASE PARTY.
HOW I FOUND MY ROOMATE JENNIFER CALANDRA CASUALLY EATING BREAKFAST (NOT HALLOWEEN).
HOW I FOUND MY ROOMATE JENNIFER CALANDRA CASUALLY EATING BREAKFAST (NOT HALLOWEEN). THEN THAT CAMERA DIED.
TABBO
TABBO at 538.
NICK KLEIN, MY TENDAR LOVING FRIEND.
NICK KLEIN, MY TENDAR LOVING FRIEND.
ARE YOU IN PAIN?
ARE YOU IN PAIN?
BLAZING EYE AT ACHERON.
BLAZING EYE AT ACHERON.
WARTHOG AT ACHERON.
WARTHOG AT ACHERON.
SANDRA ON ACID ON HER BIRTHDAY.
SANDRA ON ACID ON HER BIRTHDAY.
MANSON'S GIRL.
MANSON’S GIRL.
DEFILED FLOWER
DEFILED FLOWER.
VICTORIA RAU AT SMOG CUTTERS.
VICTORIA RAU AT SMOG CUTTERS.
LAURA DEUTSCH AND AN OLD NEW FRIEND.
LAURA DEUTSCH AND AN OLD NEW FRIEND.
CARRIE KILLING BLACK VELVET.
CARRIE KILLING BLACK VELVET.
ERIC JARSON AT THE "WHY I USE MY BODY" OPENING.
ERICA JARSON AT THE “WHY I USE MY BODY” OPENING.
MY CREW DANCING AT BODY ACTUALIZED CENTER (RIP).
MY CREW DANCING AT BODY ACTUALIZED CENTER (RIP).
CHELSEA MARKS AND HER CHILDHOOD PONYTAIL.
CHELSEA MARKS AND HER CHILDHOOD PONYTAIL.
NEPHILA AND TIMEGHOST AT MATA GALLERY.
NEPHILA AND TIMEGHOST AT MATA GALLERY.
CHELSEA MARKS, GLAMAZON.
CHELSEA MARKS, GLAMAZON.
PERFORMING RITUALS IN THE DESERT.
PERFORMING RITUALS IN THE DESERT.
WE CAME ACROSS SOME ROAMING HORSES.
WE CAME ACROSS SOME ROAMING HORSES.
CARRIE FORAGING IN THE DRAGOON MOUNTAINS. JULIA BLENDING IN.
CARRIE FORAGING IN THE DRAGOON MOUNTAINS. JULIA BLENDING IN.
SARAH BERNAT CHOKING OUT THE TAXIDERMY AT A FAR OUT TIKI DINNER PARTY, THANKS TO GREH HOLGER.
SARAH BERNAT CHOKING OUT THE TAXIDERMY AT A FAR OUT TIKI DINNER PARTY.
BOOT MURAL OUTSIDE ARMY NAVY STORE.
BOOT MURAL OUTSIDE ARMY NAVY STORE.
SARAN MAN AT MATA GALLERY.

 

DABY AND V RARE NIGHT  BURGER SHIRT.
DABY AND V RARE NIGHT BURGER SHIRT.
CROWD AFTER APPETITE SET AT MY OPENING <3
CROWD AFTER APPETITE SET AT MY OPENING ❤
ANTWON VERY RELAXED.
ANTWON VERY RELAXED.
JESSE SANES PASSING THE TIME WHILE INSTALLING "WHY I USE MY BODY".
JESSE SANES PASSING THE TIME WHILE INSTALLING “WHY I USE MY BODY”.
EXIST OTHER PEOPLE. V MANUSCRIPT TATTOO. MISERABLE MONTHS.
EXIST OTHER PEOPLE. V MANUSCRIPT TATTOO. MISERABLE MONTHS.
IMPORTANT NOISE ARTISTS AT TGIFRIDAYS. ENDLESS MOZZARELLA STICKS, SHAME.
IMPORTANT NOISE ARTISTS AT TGIFRIDAYS. ENDLESS MOZZARELLA STICKS, SHAME.
WALKER CHOPPED A LOG WITH A HAPPY FACE IN IT.
WALKER CHOPPED A LOG WITH A HAPPY FACE IN IT.
AND THEN WE BURNED IT.

 

MARGARET TACKLING OUR MOTHER DURING HER RECORD RELEASE SHOW.
MARGARET TACKLING OUR MOTHER DURING HER RECORD RELEASE SHOW.

 

PHOTOS FROM ASCETIC HOUSE 4TH OF JULY WEEKEND

First



First

 

This is by no means a comprehensive photo documentation of the weekend. Simply a few snaps of one of the most inspiring and insane weekends I have ever enjoyed in semi-chronological order. Shout out to all who made it possible, to smoke machines for looking really cool but making it really hard to take pictures and, of course, to astroglide.

Destruction Unit at the Studio at Webster Hall.
Destruction Unit at the Studio at Webster Hall.
Drew McDowell (Coil)
Drew McDowell (Coil)
Hanging up flyers before the July 4 show at Palisades.
Hanging up flyers before the July 4 show at Palisades.
Chelsea in "the alley".
Chelsea in “the alley”.
Outmode's special set which had to be altered to be performed with only one hand.
Outmode’s special set which had to be altered to be performed with only one hand.
Sandy dancin'.
Sandy dancin’.
White Boys: Jock Club + Speedboat.
White Boys: Jock Club + Speedboat.
Emil performing with Marshstepper.
Emil performing with Marshstepper.
Marshstepper.
Marshstepper.
Insert
Insert.
Nick Nappa
Nick Nappa
Jerome. Insaneeee set by the artist formally known as Lazy Magnet.
Jerome. Insaneeee set by the artist formally known as Lazy Magnet.
Margaret Chardiet
Scout Pare-Phillips.

 

Incomplete beach crew... Far Rockaway.
Incomplete beach crew… Far Rockaway.
David Allan Coe booty shorts.
David Allan Coe booty shorts.
Margaret Chardiet and Zz.
Margaret Chardiet and Zz.

 

Josh + Party Tom in matching shades in front of the lovely ghetto by the sea.
Josh + Party Tom in matching shades in front of the lovely ghetto by the sea.
Ciarra Black
Ciarra Black
We went to go see my Dad play in a surf band while the sun set before heading to Redlight District.
We went to go see my Dad play in a surf band while the sun set before heading to Redlight District.
Hosetown Hazin Craze, a homemade amusement park brought to you by Yellow Tears in celebration of the release of "Golden Showers May Bring Flowers".
Hosetown Hazin Craze, a homemade amusement park brought to you by Yellow Tears in celebration of the release of “Golden Showers May Bring Flowers”.
Nightmare slip n slide. Still covered in bruises.
Nightmare slip n slide. Still covered in bruises.
Better grab your shower cap, things are going to get wet.
Better grab your shower cap, things are going to get wet.
Nikki Sneakers getting dunked in the dunk tank.
Nikki Sneakers getting dunked in the dunk tank.
Moil.
Moil.
Ligature.
Ligature.
Saran "Mon" Man.
Saran “Mon” Man.
Mike reppin' Mommy during L.O.I.T.O.N.
Mike reppin’ Mommy during L.O.I.T.O.N.

 

Mercury Living.
Mercury Living.

Love is the Law, love under will. Thee end.
Love is the Law, love under will. Thee end.

“HIGH ON HUNGER” ZINE RELEASE PARTY IN BROOKLYN!

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Jane Chardiet, Writer and Photographer.

MY NEW ZINE HIGH ON HUNGER WILL BE MADE AVAILABLE 2/7. THERE WILL BE A RELEASE PARTY AT MOLASSES BOOKS IN BROOKLYN. FREE AND OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. 9 PM.

“High On Hunger” is a new zine by Jane Chardiet featuring personal essay, photography and interviews with 12 artists about their artistic goals in the new year. By asking artists to reflect on their accomplishments of 2013 and declare set goals for themselves in 2014, High On Hunger hopes to manifest creative action by helping to provide the vision. Each artists was photographed licking flame as it served as both a ritual and a symbol of the creative process.

Come celebrate the release, enjoy a couple drinks and browse some books.

Featuring:

☯JS Aurelius, Artist and Musician (Ascetic House/ Destruction Unit/ Marshstepper)

✳ Heather Benjamin,  Illustrator (Exorcise Book/ Sad Sex)

ϟ Margaret Chardiet, Artist and Musician (Pharmakon/ Cheena)

☠ Christopher Hansell, Musician, Curator (Ascetic House East/Warthog/ Ligature)

✌ Jesse Harding, Sculptor

✍ Trisha Low, Writer (The Compleat Purge)

⚔  Scout Pare-Phillips Photographer, Musician (Scout/ Sterling Sisters)

♒ Miles Pflanx,  Filmmaker, Performance Artist

Ⓐ Jess Poplawski Artist, Musician (Anastzi/ Surviva)

▼ Jesse Riggins, Photographer

☮ Vinny Smith, Photographer

‡ Michael Thomas Vassallo, Filmmaker

\ (•◡•) / Copies of the zine can also be ordered here: http://janepain.bigcartel.com/product/high-on-hunger-zine

Jesse Harding, Sculptor
Jesse Harding, Sculptor.
Michael Thomas Vassallo, Filmmaker
Michael Thomas Vassallo, Filmmaker.
Vinny Smith, Photographer.
Vinny Smith, Photographer.

PHOTOS FROM SUMMER 2013

Wolf Eyes playing a surprise set at the Lamb Skin/ Sagan Youth Boys show that I booked at Acheron.
Customized box at Warthog/Pharmakon/Hoax show
“Varmakon”: Var/ Pharmakon collaboration for their record release show
Russian Tsarlag setting fire to my plastic beer bag at the Ho_se
Sparse stage dive situation at Fitness center for Arts and Tactics
Sonya and Emma in Montreal
The nice lady at Enla Photo who develops my photos for me
Disturbing tree
Secret Boyfriend
Chealsea and her choker: “Fuck forever” “Sex Maniac”
Puce Mary at Sacred Bones at a Northside showcase
Pineapple door stop and stems
Phemale
Her against a woodland wallpaper
Nick beating Fizz with a belt
Narwhalz of Sound flipping over his gear table
Two babes eating ice cream cake topped with Psilocybin mushrooms
Miles with my Hello Kitty umbrella in the backyard
The drummer of Medicine with a girl backstage when before he told me he collaborated with Whitehouse
DJ Dog Dick swinging from the rafters with his legs around Mike
Chris Hansell and Margaret Chardiet with a hot dog on the fourth of July
Margaret after I tattooed my name on her arm
Jesse Riggins with a peach and an alien and New York City
Jess Poplawski from Survival
Hoax record release show
Griffin and his RV
Lamb Skin as a gothik baby princess with angel wings
Fertile Myrle
Fizz post whipping
Fizz and his sweatpants
Danny during his bartending shift
Crazy Jim from Wolf Eyes
Cities Aviv double exposure
Chris and Sully eating ice cream
Chris and Mac DeMarco
My altar
Ciarra at a Bunker Party at a Chinese Buffet in Ridgewood

JANE PAIN GOES WEST

Danny Pupillo, Marshstepper. Sonoran Pop Festival. Tempe, AZ.
Danny Pupillo, Marshstepper. Sonoran Pop Festival. Tempe, AZ.
Nude models, Marshstepper. Sonoran Pop Festival.
Hannes Norrvide (Lust for Youth), Christopher Hansell (Warthog, Foreplay) and Soren Roi (Søren, Røsenkopf) post Marshstepper at Sonoran Pop Festival.
Hannes Norrvide (Lust for Youth), Christopher Hansell (Warthog, Foreplay) and Soren Roi (Søren, Røsenkopf) post Marshstepper. Sonoran Pop Festival.
Lust For Youth, Sonoran Pop Festival.
Lust For Youth. Sonoran Pop Festival.
Pharmakon, Sonoran Pop Festival.
Pharmakon. Sonoran Pop Festival.
The View from the Sacred Bones Rented Ranch in Yucca Valley, CA.
The View from the Sacred Bones Rented Ranch in Yucca Valley, CA.
The first hot tub crew at the Sacred Bones Rented Ranch, Yucca Valley, CA. Photo by Ms. Hannah Silk Champagne. (Taylor Brode [Sacred Bones], Soren Roi, Loke Rahbek [VÅR, Posh Isolation], Margaret Chardiet [Pharmakon], Christopher Hansell, Myself and JS Aurelius [Marshstepper, Destruction Unit].
The first hot tub crew at the Sacred Bones rented ranch, Yucca Valley, CA. Photo by Ms. Hannah Silk Champagne. (Taylor Brode [Sacred Bones], Soren Roi, Loke Rahbek [VÅR, Posh Isolation], Margaret Chardiet [Pharmakon], Christopher Hansell, Myself and JS Aurelius [Marshstepper, Destruction Unit].
Elias Rønnenfelt, VÅR. Sacred Bones 5-Year Anniversary Show. Joshua Tree, CA.
Elias Rønnenfelt, VÅR. Sacred Bones 5-Year Anniversary Show. Joshua Tree, CA.
Sean Ragon (Cult of Youth), Performing with VÅR, Sacred Bones 5-Year Anniversary.
Sean Ragon (Cult of Youth), Performing with VÅR. Sacred Bones 5-Year Anniversary.
Inbetween States.
Anti-Civilization Mask, Sound and Vision After the End of the World.
Anti-Civilization Mask, Sound and Vision After the End of the World.
Body Of Light, Sound And Vision After the End of the World.
Body Of Light, Sound And Vision After the End of the World.
Christian, Gagging, dripping but yet to be whippped, VÅR, Sound and Vision after the End of the World.
Christian, Gagging, Dripping but yet to be whippped, VÅR. Sound and Vision after the End of the World.
Antwon at Tiki Ti’s, L.A., C.A.

Interview with Pharmakon

Margaret in Redlight District’s backyard.

I Want to talk about Pharmakon’s beginning. Tell me about where you were in your life, at that time.

Well, I guess at the time that I started Pharmakon; it was a really lonely time… but I think it is not as though ‘the place’ was the reason. It was always dark before then, too. It has always been dark. It wasn’t specifically that time or place that bred Pharmakon; it was something that accumulated over the course of my entire life.

When I found out about noise, it was an amazing revelation. I had found my medium. It was like: ‘Holy shit, this exists, this is what I have been looking for. This is what I have needed for all these years’… I was making this other stuff [music] that just wasn’t doing it for me. Pharmakon was something that had been boiling inside of me for sixteen years.  I could finally fucking exorcise it out of me. And look at it. And evaluate it. It wasn’t where I was living or what I was doing, [pharmakon] had been coming a long time.

Do you still feel the same way about Pharmakon?

Yes. Whenever I have problems with Pharmakon I am a complete fucking wreck and I find it really hard to function. I feel very, very depressed, very withdrawn. Very driven, but also very negative. I question myself, and the world, every step of the way.

There is always this part when I break through… I have a fucking revelation and then it’s like … The set has come together. Everything is okay again and I feel empowered and I can move on.

So Pharmakon is the Most important thing in your life? 

I could not stop doing it or I would literally go insane. Pharmakon is about a very specific concept, but it is not something that is outside of myself, it is an extension of myself. It is not like Pharmakon is my alter ego or just some alias that I go under. Pharmakon is me. At all times. There is no way to extricate myself from it, which is kind of scary and depressing.

Do you feel comfortable talking a little bit about the specific concepts behind Pharmakon?

The name it’s self is the gateway to understanding what the project is about. Pharmakon is an ancient Greek word; it means both poison and remedy, at the same time. It is the philosophy of something being dual in nature. The idea that something which could harm you, could also help you. But the distinction that is important to me is that the project is about duality, not juxtaposition, it is not about two things that are on opposite sides of the same spectrum, it is about two things that are opposite being the same thing.

There are many themes that fall under that umbrella. If you break [Pharmakon] down to it’s core, it is human connection. It’s not some cold power electronics project. It’s hot and sticky. It is the moisture in your groin. What is it? You can’t help it; it’s just there. I didn’t mean to put it there. I know it’s offensive, but the human race is disgusting. If they think I am acceptable, then I am doing something wrong, frankly.

You’ve had several releases in the past but they are extremely difficult to get your hands on. Very limited editions. Is that intentional or is that just the only means that you had to release your recordings?

It is a little of both.  I’ve had many offers from various labels, small, medium and large offering to put stuff out, but I feel that a release as a finished project is something that is so specific, especially in noise/industrial/PE that it is something that has to be whole and complete. Part of that is the music, the lyrics, the artwork and the label that it is on. It does say something about the context of the record.

(Laughs) Well, there is an entire record that I have recorded TWICE. The material was written in 2009 and it still hasn’t come out. I have entire full lengths that I have recorded and have an inclination to release but… I am true to myself. And my art. And if it isn’t what it is supposed to be, I am not going to release it. I am not going to jam for two hours and think that someone is going to care. If I am not completely at peace and passionate about a release, I could not expect

anybody else to give two shits about it. And if they did like it, I would be extremely upset at them. I would rather have someone hate me for the wrong reasons than like me for the wrong reasons.

The accidental part is that I mostly focus on live performance. Pharmakon is a live project, essentially. I am, right now, moving more towards recording but it has also been really important to me to play live because of the experience that it is.

Image
Margaret gives me a preview of her set for Saturday’s show with Bone Awl.

Do you think it is more important for people to see you live than to listen to a recording? What is going on before, during and after a Pharmakon live show and how do you want people to feel when they see you perform live?

I think it is important to see my project live. I think if you are casually watching videos on youtube, or you are hearing one release or a collaboration that I have done with someone else you have absolutely no scope of what the project actually is. Live performance is incredibly important to me because live performance deals with the intangible and the impalpable. It deals with the “x-factor”, the other thing that is in music that cannot possibly come across in recording. Performance deals with a personal connection to other people through the music. Obviously, this is experienced through recording, but live, it is a completely different thing.

Connection to the audience is something that is incredibly important to me. It is a weird, parasitic, symbiotic relationship that I have. I feed off the audiences energy. But they throw back what I am feeding to them. You can play a show to three fucking people, and it is in some weird basement that smells like shit and can play through a PA that sounds like somebody farting underwater and you can have the best fucking show. Those three people can know you and understand your music and feel it and give you that energy that you need to kill it. Other shows, you can be there, and there can be a bunch of people but…

There are many different ways to connect to an audience, too. Over the years I have experimented with many different ways. People who go to a live performance have a need to connect with other human beings. Currently, in the 21st century, when we have all this technology that makes [connection] easy… It is cheapened, a lot. People don’t know how to physically and viscerally connect anymore. It is tragic…

The person who is performing has to have a need to connect. It is perverse. And I’m a fucking pervert; I need to connect with the audience in a way that is uncomfortable. Maybe it is something as simple as looking into people’s eyes.

Even that makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

 It does. And it is funny, too. Some people try to laugh, like it’s not big deal. I look into their eyes the longest; because they laugh out of nervous laughter. I am saying what I need to say, and I am looking them in the eyes and they are laughing. They are uncomfortable and I keep looking. Eventually, they start to get more comfortable. They stop laughing. It’s not funny anymore.

But my favorites are people that I am not reaching. My favorites are when I am looking into the audience, and I am telling them something and they have a disconnect and they think that they can look at me and not have a connection with me. No. I am getting inside of you. Right now. No matter how they decide to react, I have made them react. That is my control.

So we are talking about levels of connection. There is something as simple as looking someone in the eye and then it goes to more aggressive behaviors, which are appropriate sometimes. A long-standing tradition in power electronics.

You’re chipped tooth looks really good, by the way.

Thanks! That aggressive approach is sometimes appropriate or needed but is not always. It is typically what I am the least interested in, but it is somehow what people seem to perceive my contact to be. What I am really more interested in is something that I have been experimenting more with recently, which is what happens… At the Tesco USA show, or something.

There are a lot of people at the show. I am up on the stage, kind of separate. I was interested in breaking that boundary and come into the audience. It wasn’t an aggressive thing, where I have some sort of ego or bravado to say I am this ONE person in a couple hundred and I can fucking intimidate you. It is not about intimidation. It was me wanting to be touching a specific person in the audience: I am touching you; I am saying this to you. It might make you feel extremely uncomfortable, but do you think that it is more comfortable to be on stage with all these people having access only to you? No.

You know that everyone in the room is looking at you. If not they are looking at their phone or something, but guess what? I am going to fucking make you look at me. That is a problem with live performance. A lot of people in the audience are more interested in seeing the other people at the live performance as opposed to the performer.

They want to be seen. Fuck that. If you are coming here and you have any idea what this genre of music is about, you should be able to handle me caressing you and coming up behind you.

WARNING.

Warning. I am going to look you in the eye. Guess what? That is the most basic form of human interaction. I swear to fucking god, 75% of the population cannot handle it…we live in an age when you don’t have to look people in the eye. How many fucking parties have you gone to, where half the fucking people there are looking at their fucking Iphones, talking to people who are not at the party. About the party. They are taking to someone on the phone because I don’t actually want to be present. Live performance is about presence.

Live performance is also sonic. The sonic presence of live performance is something that you cannot get from recording… The presence of the sound mixed with the psychological and emotional and artists’ presence of the performer and the energy of the room… Which is what I am talking about when I talk about ‘x-factor’, that. All this stuff I do with connection is digging at people trying to get at that thing, that ‘x-factor’. That thing that you can not explain after going to see a live performance, this thing. It is not that it sounded great; it wasn’t that the performer was flailing around on stage or something like that, it is just the energy in the room, collectively, and that requires other people.

It is so interesting to watch the connections that you make with people, sometimes. For, example, Tesco fest. I also get my rocks off watching you perform and watching other people’s reactions to you performing live. Watching people squirm. But I felt like people were scared of you. A lot of people only know a little bit about you, or have heard something about you and don’t know what to expect. When you went into the audience, it was like you could feel collective discomfort in the room because people didn’t know what was going to happen next.

It is a powerful thing because people think that aggression is the way to influence people or to get under their skin. But when I went out into the audience, the moshing stopped, and that was what I wanted. It was a tender thing… I am not going out into the audience and pushing people… I am a five-foot tall girl. I look like white bread, whatever. Aggression is not the tradition of power electronics that I am grasping from. I think it is much more powerful and much more threatened by human interaction than the bravado of ‘I’m tougher than you’. That is really important. When I am performing, and I touch someone on the shoulder, everyone in the audience is wondering who is next. They are scared of that, and why? Right?

That is why live performance is important to me. This is a solo project. It’s just me. I am responsible for all the material, content, concepts, words, electronics, vocals, recording, and performance… I play by myself. But live, there is another layer. It is not as though the audience are collaborators, but there is something for me to suck up.

Do you have any experiences with people who just don’t get it, that stick out in your mind at all? How do you deal with people who just don’t fucking get it?

This is the thing; people will not come up to you after a show and say, to your face that they don’t get it. If they don’t get it, they go on the computer and talk shit about you. They don’t talk shit to you. If someone has a problem with what I do, I fucking DARE them to come up to me and tell me what they think about it. And I will talk to them. I will be fucking psyched. But guess what? Not a single person has ever done that.

People don’t ever ask you questions about what you just did after a performance? Thoughtfully? Or even unthoughfully? Drunkenly?

Questions, no. People have given me ‘statements’…I get a lot of comments… ‘YOU GO GIRL! That is empowering! It is great what you are doing as a girl!’ …. Do [they] think that gender was the major factor in play? Do [they] think that performance was about gender? Fuck off. It is really trivializing. I wish they didn’t like me. I would rather have someone hate me for the wrong reasons than like me for the wrong reasons. Can I piss during this interview?

Can I record it?

YEAH! [Margaret records a steady stream]

So what is the climate in noise right now? A lot of people that used to do harsh noise have gravitated towards doing more industrial stuff, or techno or dance. I know that you are a fan of some of these artists, but what is it like being a power electronics artist right now?

 I do feel fairly lonely. Especially regionally. From what I have observed in the meager five or six years that I have been involved with this there are so many waves. Shit comes in and out of fashion and frankly I don’t really care. I guess when you are making noise or industrial or power electronics you don’t get much feedback as it is. I feel as though I create in a vacuum all of the time. So weather or not there is an appreciation, or a space, or a community that appreciates what I do specially, I am going to keep doing what I do.

In 2006, I felt like there was more of a community for p.e. and noise, harsh shit. And now it’s not so much. But, I also have this privilege of being a part of a group of friends that are insanely critical and supportive. I am extremely lucky to have people around me that hold me accountable for what I do, regardless of the genre. I feel that the art that I make is outside of genre. It doesn’t matter weather of not power electronics or noise are popular at the moment, because that is what this project is and I will make it regardless of weather people like it or not.

We’ve had a hard time booking shows at our house recently, because there are simply not that many good projects around anymore. So we’ll have tours coming through, and we wondering who we will book on the show and it’s crickets. There are not that many good bands.

Even in New York City.

Even in fucking New York City! We are in a bit of a lull point, but I don’t really care. It picks up, is farts out, it picks up it farts out. To me, Pharmakon is a painful project. And it will always be painful. But never more or less depending on the climate.

Speaking of community, you live at a venue in Far Rockaway. Far the fuck out.

There is a reason why “far” is part of the name.

It is kind of lawless over here. It is like Wild West by the sea. It is a little bit scary. As far as location, it is isolated, but you have an inspiring group of friends that you live with. What is the Redlight District to you and how do you feel after Nick (Diaphragm, former room mate at RLD), Jesse Allen and Jackie (Very close confidants to all the room mates at the RLD) all moving away at the same time.

It’s funny. This is actually an extremely simple answer to a very complicated question. Redlight District is a group of friends. There may be 13 or 15 bands that come out of our group, but it’s really just a couple dudes connected on a very important level who make art together. And so the fact that Jackie, Jesse and Nick moved away doesn’t make them any less close to us. This is our family. What we have as a group of people is love for each other.

I don’t use the word love lightly. Love to me is something very rare. Very exotic, foreign. Hard to understand. And yet, I am so fucking lucky because I exist within a group of people who love each other. Who can fucking say that?

These are friends that transcend periods of time and space. Literally, the Redlight District is something that exists nowhere. We live in this house. It doesn’t fucking matter. Here is a set of people who have found that every single person feels [love] for every person in a group of people. This is something that does not occur, typically.

A lot of the Redlight District went to college together for sound. All of them say that what they learned had nothing to do with their schooling, but through the people that they met through that experience, and that is the group of friends that we have right now. It is something that I can’t explain and frankly I do not have the right to explain it. None of us individually have the words to do that. Gebo, the rune, the one that looks like an x, that the Nazi’s misused… The idea that the sum is greater than it’s parts. That is what the Redlight District is. Individually, we wouldn’t have what we have together and space and time cannot fuck with that. People can live wherever the fuck they want, we still have that.

But they try to insert themselves into it. People try to ride your collective dick a lot.

You can always spot a phony,

So, obviously there is inspiration is the Redlight District but where else do you find inspiration?

People are always like ‘what are your influences’, but you are asking what inspires me… Inspiration is life. Inspiration is not just the people that I am surrounded by or the music that I listen to, literature that I read. What inspires you to think? Why are you a human and not an ape? That is inspiration.

I understand that you are preparing a new set for a show with Bone Awl. What can we expect? What are you working on? What is changing?

This set is a weird combination/transitional composition between new ideas I had while writing the new Lp, mixed with some shit that I had been putting on the backburner a little bit. Stuff I didn’t want to deal with yet, emotionally. So this is a purge forward, grasping at grandiose ideas for the next phase of Pharmakon. A lurch forward towards what will happen next.

Collaged flyer designed by Margaret.

How is recording going for the upcoming LP?

All of the electronics are recorded and are in the process of being bounced. Ryan (Yellow Tears, DYsgeniX, etc) is helping me record on an 8-track, which gives it a full sound. The vocals are next, so I guess I can tell you after that. That is always the most harrowing, difficult part of the process I think. It is all I have been focusing on lately. When you say ‘how is it going’, I don’t know how to respond to that. How is my life going? I’ve been obsessed.

You go to school for visual art, and you are a visual artist as well, so what are the differences for you between visual art and noise? What do you get out of visual art that you do not get out of noise? Pharmakon does not satisfy all of your creative urges… you still feel the desire to make visual art.

All of the art that I make starts first and foremost with a concept, an idea. Then I scramble and claw at a way to produce this concept, to express this concept. I believe that different ideas and concepts need to be produced in different ways. Not every concept can be funneled into the same process. The same way as Pharmakon is an extension of myself, the same goes for my visual art. It’s just different ways that it is expressed.

Image
Margaret posing with her mummifying severed duck head, which will be used in a visual piece at a later time.

The last question is a little bleak. You’ve been doing Pharmakon for a long time. Will it ever be over? How will you know that it’s over?

When I die.

Pharmakon is performing alongside Bone Awl and a FFH & HIV Coroner Collab, at the Redlight District. 4/6/2012. 8 pm.